Last guest post! I’m coming home tomorrow!!!! Today I’m so excited to have Kristine of Kristine Aletha Weddings talking about the importance of preparing for marriage :-) Wil and I went through a class at our church before getting married (which was fine….but definitely not enough on it’s own). I can’t tell you how valuable it will be to have someone else who is as committed to the health and longevity of your relationship as you are. If you can find a counselor/therapist before you get married, you’ll be lightyears ahead! (Images below of Kristine & her hubby coordinating at Hollyn & Matt’s Redfield Estate Wedding this fall)
Most couples spend months, if not years, planning and preparing for their wedding. But how many spend time preparing for their marriage? Consider this statistic: Half of the marriages that will fail end by the fifth year of marriage. That means that the beginning years of marriage, as well as the time leading up to it, are crucial. They lay the foundation for the lifetime a couple will spend together. And no, that doesn’t mean that you have to solve all of your problems before then but you should have a good idea of how to deal with them.
Marriage preparation helps you learn better ways of communicating and resolving conflict. It teaches you how to take a timeout (no, not like you’re five), how to problem solve, and how to listen (yes, there is a correct way to listen and no, you’re probably not already a pro at it). It teaches you about your own sensitive issues and better enables your partner to walk carefully around them. It encourages compassion, for yourself and for one another, and discourages unhealthy, unrealistic expectations. Because there will be conflict. And you will have differences. The key is not how you reduce them (or ignore them) but how you manage them.
When couples take time to prepare for their marriage, they’re setting an important precedent. They’re saying that their relationship takes priority, and that it takes time and effort. They’re acknowledging the fact that they are entering into a serious and sacred commitment. And it is serious and sacred, pledging to join your life with another’s. It’s no easy task. For better, for worse. Isn’t it time we start planning for that, too?
If you have questions about marriage preparation, I’d be happy to answer them. Send me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org or visit my website.